For the last 18 months my inner strength has been tested. I was assaulted early last year. In an hour I will have to testify against him for the fourth time.

This community has offered so much support over the last year. You all are amazing.

I know I can do this, but I'm just so tired of feeling this way. Over the last week I've prepared mentally and spiritually.

Last time I was set to testify I posted here requesting positive energy, and it was immensely appreciated. Your strength helped me so much. I felt like I had kindred witchy energy in my corner. I would once again be deeply grateful for any positivity you can send my way today.

Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

Edit: Thank you all so much!!! I just finished up, but I may have to go back in today or tomorrow. All of your kind words make me so grateful to have this beautiful community!

I treasure each kindness you have blessed me with today. I am thoroughly convinced this is the best reddit community and I feel fortunate to have each of you thinking of me. I look forward to the day I get to circle all this beautiful light back.

Edit #2:

Just got the call. He was found not guilty. It's done... I am devastated.

I may have to testify again at some point regarding the restraining order, but he has gotten away with it. My own father, crushing me, choking me and nearly killing me. Punching my mother in the face. He's off, free to continue on. He's probably celebrating right now. Convinced those 12 jurors that he's such a stand-up guy. We were hobbled from the start as his past abuse could not be brought up. I am gutted to my core.

Again, thank you all for your support over the last day. Your words empowered me, but I think the rest of today I will be spent retreating into defeat. Our justice system sucks.

Tomorrow is a new day, and after a good sulky depressive episode I will dust myself off and keep going.

It's just so damn depressing in this moment.

Much love to you all ❤