To make me fat.

I’m just an average angsty uni student. I’m constantly juggling several assignments at once. “Working” on one, then the other. I get it all done, but realistically I’m just procrastinating. Whilst stressing out the entire time. I worry about failing and letting everyone down. I’m deathly afraid of falling behind.

But that fear is also a fantasy. What if I just let my deadline lapse and continue gooning? See if I care that I didn’t pass those exams. I’m just gonna continue putting away several “study” snacks all day long.

Yet I don’t go through with it. The desire to waste away and fatten up is there. I just can’t follow through. I need a girl to hold me accountable. I need her to push me further and further into ruining myself. To revel in it and not be shy about it. Fatten me through incessant pampering and babying, sickly sweet love, slick and sly manipulation, or overt abuse. It doesn’t matter how you do it. Thing is, you enjoy it. You want nothing more to see me grow and won’t stand any sort of refusal.

And I will struggle. I’ll try to stay on track, but you’ve gotten everything covered. What little work I manage to get done, you’ll just undo when I’m inevitably dozing off from the plentiful treats you’ve provided me with. You’ll obfuscate my handbooks, fiddle with my calender, anything to ensure I veer off course and on track to do what I don’t have to guts for.

To make me fat.