I'm just so frustrated at myself and the way my bank does overdraft fees. I've had a bit of some medical issues recently, causing me to FMLA a bunch at work. I'm working on catching my bills up now from the hole I've dug.

Well, I made some necessary purchases this past week, for a new place in moving to and bills, all while I had money in my account. These charges showed up on my balance and removed from the total just fine. However, then I realized I needed gas, and food for my new place. Realizing I didn't have enough anymore, I did a SMART limit withdrawal, allowing me to go over my balance on a withdrawal, for an overdraft fee. I did so using the balance that my bank account showed me, reflecting the previous purchases. The problem is, those charges were still pending for days. They then all went through, hitting me with a bunch of overdraft fees.

I'll use random numbers as examples: I have $100 on my account. Pay $30 bill, buy $30 of food, pay $20 for household items.

This would leave me with $20 having spent $80, all properly showing on balance. Well, oops, I really need gas to even make it to work, and I completely forgot this other bill I had to pay. Shit happens, I get paid again in a week. So I pull $100 out putting me at $-80. Knowing a $35 fee is coming, I'm ok with it, meaning I'm at $-115.

Then the pending stuff finally hits, days later, while the withdrawal hit immediately. So now, I get hit with overdraft fees for all 3 previous purchases, that's another $105. I'm now $-220 instead of $-115, throwing my plans and bills way off. The numbers are different and much worse, but the point is there for the example.

I get that's just how it works, but it doesn't make it suck any less. I'm just frustrated with myself for not pushing through my medical issues and just going to work on the days I needed to FMLA, in order to keep my checks more stable so this wouldn't happen. I'm frustrated that my entire next paycheck will be non-existent, if even enough to break even, (doubt it). I'm frustrated that I'm just now moving to a new place, same landlord, and he's gonna chew my head off for not having any rent this coming Friday, and still owing him past rent.

I'm working on it, I make decent money, life just happened and I was unable to work many days. I can crawl out of this hole, it will just take months, and with my depression, medical stuff, etc... It's going to be a huge drain, mentally, emotionally, and physically, all while trying to convince the companies I owe that in working in it, I'll get there. I'm frustrated with life for being so expensive. I'm frustrated at myself for not doing better, being better. I can't even properly address my medical issues because my doctor of 33 years, literally my entire life, from birth on, is no longer covered under my insurance. I'm almost out of medicine, and I have to find a new PCP, who is gonna have to schedule an appointment, determine their opinion on my needs, then prescribe me my medicine. Medicine I may or may not be able to afford at that time.

Stuff just keeps stacking and I'm just tired. Sorry this was so majorly long, I needed to get that out.