Yesterday I finally blocked my ex. I felt relief for a brief period then I couldn’t stop thinking of her. She’s really messed up my head. We were together for a year she gave me all kinds of love and attention and I was my very best for her. I helped her become a better person and even got her back in the gym. She then suddenly started to slowly fade and broke it off with me and said she was poly and wanted to have multiple sex partners. I started seeing another woman that was good to me and started getting over her. When she found out she came over and cried in my bed begging me not to leave her. She told me she didn’t want anyone but me. I stupidly thought she loved me again so I ended things with the woman to give her another chance, even though I was scared the entire time. Things started to feel like they were and I slowly started to let my walls down again. We went out of town together on a trip. The day we got back she told me she had a date that same night. This really broke my heart. I asked her why she waited until we came back to tell me. Why she just let me believe things were ok. That she obviously had to be talking to this person knowing how I felt about her. I then called her selfish and she was not happy about that. It feels like she seeks me out when she’s down then uses me to get herself back up and throws me away like I’m nothing, and im so stupid sitting here just wanting her. We hadn’t talked in a while i asked her what i did. What i did to draw her away from me. Her reply what that I did nothing at all and that I’m great. THEN WHY? Why treat me this way.i told her that her actions are making me sad. Her reply was that she’s happy now so my feelings don’t matter. They never mattered when she upsets me and it hurts so much. I hate that I’m here’s thinking about her while she doesn’t give a damn about me. My friends don’t like her but I’ve defended her so much and i hate it. I hate that she’s still in my heart that I’d care if she cry when I’m nothing at all to her. I just feel so pathetic. Anyways I blocked her on everything i hope i can stop thinking of her. Sorry for the rant i just had to get that out