TW: Narcissistic abuse/dating/manipulation

When you hear the term narcissist most people think of raging alcoholic guy with anger issues. Noone talks about the subtle ones.

People are quick to point fingers at men in dating but with little awareness to how manipulative and narcissistic some women can be.

They're immature, spiteful, emotionally manipulative, they love bomb, they throw fits, etc Theyll hurt you and instead of apologize theyll make you feel like you're in the wrong. Then they'll hold it against you, gaslight and invalidate you and push you to the point of snapping.

Then when you snap, yell, and even curse suddenly you're abusive and they're the victim. If you ever date one prepare for loads of reactive abuse. #yesmenareabusedto

Did i mention immature? Lol like theyll shame you for liking stuff and call you childish amd accuseyou of playing games... but then they'll do petty shit thatll fuck up your whole day or even week or month, all because you called them out or said something they didnt like.

For example, theyll kick/lock you out of the house for the night and you have work early in the morning and you're in nothing but pjs, so now youll not only get a shitty nights rest but also with no uniform/clothes to wear and theyll say its "not my problem", all because you didnt agree with them or called them out.

The moment you try to hold them accountable they're quick to turn on you. Theyll call you immature, unaccountable, abusive, manipulative, hypocritical, etc.. just about everything that they are, but try to project it on to you.

For those that are like "yea ok i wont get myself into a situation like that" Female narcissist tend to love bomb especially if your a decent guy whos had trauma and is clingy/affectionate... its hard because they fullfill that like noone else... dating a narcissist is difficult because they dont show it right away and by the time they do your already so invested and theyve got you to the point of questioning yourself "am i the narcissist? Am i abusive? Is this normal and im just over thinking it?

Don't get me wrong they dont appear as the devil nor are they the devil all the time, sometimes or most of the time they can be amazing in many ways, generous, affectionate, great in bed, etc... but when it matters and your at a low especially if it involves them hurting you... that darkness becomes apparent. A narcissist can still be a semi good person.. but too often that theyre manipulative and vindictiveness coming that it can really harm you and your relationship.

Theyll do their best to minimize your feelings or the reasons why you are feeling the way you are. Like oh hes just in a bad mood because i wouldn't insert petty unrelated thing... like no he's in a bad mood because you're playing with his feelings and condescending him and now you are downplaying what you did to hurt / upset him. And instead of doing what, ya know, any halfway decent human would and ASK him why he's upset... and LISTEN to him without being combative... you'd realize what happened, and what you BOTH can do to remedy and build a strong relationship going forward... because honestly if you arent with him to build a strong lasting relationship then why be with him at all waisting everyones time.

Female narcissists are usually physically abusive but they are vindictive, neurotic, spiteful, and will fuck with your head just enough but not too much sp when u snap and they cry about it... you look bad and they're "worried about you".