Stories like this make me love urban legends so much. Good morals teach the general public to smarten up.

This story is about a pessimistic fellow who was down on his luck and decided that it was in everyone's best interest if he would just commit suicide. So he decided that he would hang himself on a branch that hangs over a cliff. The cliff was a 50 foot drop into a body of water. He also wanted to feel no pain from this so he took some medication to numb his senses. On top of this he decided that he also wanted to shoot himself in the head as he hung to seal the deal. If this wasn't enough, he also planned to swallow poison a moment before he tightened the noose.

The man is ready. He takes the medicine, swigs the poison and puts the noose around his neck. He raises the gun but in his drowsy state the gunshot misses his head and the bullet breaks the branch sending him 50 feet down into the water where he swallows a large sum of salt water, he swims to shore and immediately vomits water and the poison. He stands up as a wiser man.