Now I am sitting here so bummed out because you called and I didn't hear my phone ring. I look forward to every chance we can talk. I miss you so much and I hate it.

I am going out tonight with someone I met and I like him. I am doing everything I can to get you out of my head and out of my heart. You mean so much to me and I wish you wouldn't anymore. I wish you didn't have this affect on me but you do. And I have given up on thinking it will eventually stop. But I am still going to do everything I can to get unstuck and off this shelf you made for me.

I miss your presence in my life. I miss the feeling of reprieve when we got together. So free and open and just our world. I miss you wholly and I need you so badly to stop haunting me. Living in this imprint of you has left me hollow. Wish me luck tonight. Maybe I can get you out of my head for even an hour or 2. Miss you birthday buddy. Miss you so much everyday and I hate myself for it every day too