I miss what I had with you. Your clinginess, cuteness. Your ability to adjust.

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I want to miss you, but I know there's no point in missing anyone. There's no point in regretting about past. There's no point in worrying about a problem that has no solution.

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It doesn't help me one bit whether you cry for me, or write a thousand such letters or reddit posts. I appreciate your affection. But we need to be practical. You should rather do something that causes self improvements in you or helps in progress of our relationship beyond just an online thing.

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I still don't know why u left. I'll be always scared of getting too attached to you because I know your volatile emotions and that you may leave anytime again.

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Maybe you shouldn't do what you are doing. You are making me feel loved, wanted, from a distance. Something, the girl that i'm speaking to right now doesnt do. She's always busy with work. Hardly has 5 minutes a day to spare for me. I want to break up with her (we are not committed ) , but I have no one else. I admire her hardworking nature, ambition, practicality. I wish you had 20% of her traits in you or I wish she had 80% of your traits in her. She's not at all feminine, clingy, submissive, talkative. I miss your long long messages. Her short replies make me feel she's not that much into me.

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But your thing about being a backup option for me might hurt either you or the girl that I happen to be speaking to then. I won't be able to hurt you to commit to someone else nor would I be able to hurt them to get back with you. And I can't stay lonely and waiting for something that may never happen. Talking to women gives me a hope that atleast someone might accept me, that I might be compatible with someone.

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But my inbox is pretty empty lately. Your unsent messages are keeping me alive. Else, i'd be long dead like a living corpse.

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Please tell me what u want from me? Why u left? Why u write those lovey-dovey posts about me?

What could I have done to make you stay? What could I have done to convince you to get into relationship with me? Or do u not want a relationship?

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I have started working out again. So my body is becoming fitter and i'm turning more good looking day by day. Haven't been able to get myself to get back to work though yet. I still feel unloved by parents from time to time. The loneliness is overwhelming.

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This fairytale love is damaging us both. We can't afford to get back to talking whole day like we used to. We need to focus on practicality. My suggestion to you is use me as a source of hope for yourself (or a sort of backup option ) to give you strength and start searching for a partner for yourself in your country . Because long distance can be really hard for you.