I love you, my lady who smells of peaches. My lady whose kind smile could convince the sun to fall and the stars to encircle her so they could bask in her kindness and loving eyes. The lady who, just twenty minutes ago called me and told me that she thinks this could all be a mistake. That I was her 7 year long mistake, and she has her whole life ahead of her.

That she didn't want to be held back, or hold me back, from meeting the one of my dreams. I cried and tried to silence myself as she spoke. I tried to not let the gloomy face of depression whisper sweet yet bitter words into my ear. I asked if you still loved me, and you told me it was irrelevant. You're probably right.

I wish I told you that I didn't want 'the one' for me, I couldn't care less if better is out there. I want her, I want to put in the work to keep her, I want to do anything it takes. I wanted to, my love, but I knew those words weren't about me. You threw it in so I wouldn't think you thought you were too good for me, but we both know they were for you. That I'm not good enough, and never was. That those seven years was because you were certain you wouldn't find better, but now you're skinny and everyone else can see what I've always seen- That you're fucking beautiful. And your thoughts are right, I don't deserve you.

All things considered, love, where does this leave us? I still have you for now, and your sleeping on the phone as I sit here writing this letter. Maybe you're right, love. Your mom will never agree for us to be together, she'd be thrilled to see you with a man. You'd be thrilled to be with a man, someone who would never have to hide the love. Someone taller than you, sweeter, and not depressed. Someone who wants kids just as much as you. I want to compromise with you. I want a boring life, filled with 'what ifs' and stress. I want a white picket fence, and a 9-5 job that I work in hopes of gaining time with you and our kids. None of it would be a regret for me. None of it, if I had you. I don't want to know the person I would be without you.

My love, my peach, my world and everything in between. I'm sorry if I'm not enough, I know you're so far out of my league. I just never thought it would come to this. You're the only one I want, in an ocean of worry and stress. This life is never certain, and I can assure you that no matter what, you will hold regrets. I just hope that I won't be one of them.

Please tell me the last 7 years wasn't a regret, love.