Why is it that I mourn terribly for something that never could've happened? You were always clear that there will never be an "us" and foolishly, I accepted that. We talked everyday. The mundane and the things we'd never get to tell others. You know I was never afraid of being emotionally vulnerable. I can't say the same for you.

You were so cold. Funny, isn't it? You always called me warm and kind and you admitted to being cold. But just like that, I was a moth drawn to a flame. So terrible. I longed for something that's impossible.

Ever since we last talked, I keep reminding myself to be selfish. Yet I keep checking for your emails. Whatever you've done to me is so terrible, V. I've got no more love to give you. Yet I still care for you. Just terrible terrible feeling.