I have no idea how to start this. It's been over a year and I still miss you. I'm not sure if it's you I miss or the instant undeniable connection we had. Either way I've been chasing after the feeling you left behind. Causing me to hurt myself and others in it's wake. I'm sorry that I cut you off so abruptly I couldn't handle seeing you move on what seemed like easily while I was sad and wanting to talk to you everyday. I always knew our relationship if you could call it that but I think we can both agree we were more than friends even though we both knew not to think about it too much but I knew it would inevitably end. I thought I was okay with it that we would go about our lives and everything would be the same. Yet here I am still thinking of you. I can't help but want us to meet up again. Every post I make I wonder and hope if it will reach you. Will you know it's me? Would you even care at this point? Maybe in another timeline we would of met when we both could of handled the feeling that eventually developed between us. When we both weren't slightly broken and could start a healthy relationship. I don't want to keep dwelling on what ifs and wondering what I should of done instead. So since I know now we'll never meet again this is what I should of told you then. My feelings for you were complicated and they scared me. I don't think I was ready to fall in love and neither were you. It hurt to go from talking everyday to radio silence. Yet I don't regret meeting you. I hope life has treated you well since then and you gave me the courage to seek help for myself. Thank you so much for that. You may never realize it but after our time together I knew I couldn't keep leaving myself in the dark hole I was in I had to try to live. I'm still not perfect I'm making lots of mistakes and failing at life still but the key is now I know I want to try to live. I'm not a zombie anymore going through life wishing death would take me. Thank you for your help in getting me to that point. All that is left to say now is goodbye take care and I hope you find the happiness you deserve.