Years ago with my husband and I would fight he would tell me that nobody would wanna love me that everybody just wants to fuck me and then I would never find anybody to love me so I gave up on it. When I was sleeping with you I knew that you didn’t love me and I knew that I wasn’t seeing the real you, just like when I was sleeping with Cameron, I knew he wasn’t telling me the truth and I knew it wasn’t gonna find anybody to love me in either of you. You didn’t play me you didn’t even play with my emotions. You didn’t even tell me that you cared you far from played me. I got played with that stupid car that’s for sure. And that’s kind of why I said to just friends with benefits because what’s the point I’d rather have a motions and not expressed them, then try to fight for something that is not worth my time. I can talk about a lot of the things that you have said. But I haven’t really talked about the way it made me feel. I don’t think anybody can hurt me as much as you have physically emotionally and mentally. They haven’t seen the monster that I’ve seen they haven’t been attacked like I have they haven’t had to spit come flying in their face and hands around their neck and shit getting thrown at them every day they don’t know what it feels like to be mentally ill and not have somebody help them. Instead, they sit there and they watch it get worse and then they sit there and say it’s OK. It’s not your fault, but you don’t need to go to the hospital, you’re fine when in reality you’re definitely not fine A part of me feels like he enjoyed the torture that I went through daily, and he enjoyed using it against me in arguments. Your games and your judgment and your lies don’t phase me. I have survived the most monsters monster, and it still managed to make it out alive. You have no idea what I have faced.