I was invited to a bachelor party in which I dont really like the groom all that much, but I dont want to hurt his feelings by saying I dont want to go. Not only that, but theyre going to want to party, and while I used to like to party and get drunk, I really do not anymore, and some of my old friends havent fully accepted/come to terms with how much Im really over that (maybe I haven't made it clear enough though). Lastly, theyre discussing destinations that are very far, like different continent. if im going abroad, im not going to "party" I want to experience the culture of that country and see the sights.

If the bach party is throwing in for the grooms hotel flight, ill contribute and eat the money if I have to.

I could just "call out sick", but this would require me to lie about buying the flight, hotel, etc. If its an airbnb, ill have to contribute then probably lose that money too (again, not a problem). The problem here starts when the group plans stuff like a boat rental or other activities, and asks for my contribution, it could all add up, then they have planned for me to be there and I'm not.

I cant say "work is crazy right now" because its being planned months and months in advance.

I cant say I cant afford it, they'll know its a lie. one of my boys (an actual close friend I dont wish to disappoint) who is going knows how much I make and knows I have next to no expenses. Also, this one close friend said to me "you cant drop out and make me go with them by myself". so I might need a good excuse here. I dont want to disappoint my close friend, or hurt the grooms feelings, but going on this trip would be worse than a short trip to hell lol