Affair-having couple looking for a woman to join us…the male wishes to fulfil a fantasy and the female desperately wants to taste her first pussy - we want to find a woman where there is mutual attraction between the 3 of us for ongoing fun and shenanigans!

So just to confirm....

Yes, we are having an affair with each other.

If you're still reading this we assume that means you are indeed a human of the female variety and not phased or put off by our "situation".

What we want:

A curvy female, aged between 28 and 50, marital status is unimportant, so long as you're discreet, have a smooth pussy (or well groomed at least), fantastic boobs is a must for V and most importantly of all: an awesome personality!

So if you have nice big tits and an equally nice arse, paired with a cracking personality; we want to hear from you!

What we DON'T want:

A dude/man/bloke/gent/guy - however you introduce yourselves, we're not interested.

Couples where the woman doesn't play solo, this includes couples where the man poses as the woman (yes, we've had that before!)

People who aren't naturally chatty; you can be an introvert and still a bit chatty - if you notice no-one has said anything in the group chat, drop a message, wish us good morning, start the chat off for the day!

What are we bringing to the table?

We're a two-fer, why chat to one person when you can chat to two simultaneously!? We like to take things easy, we won't put pressure on you for anything (except for a selfie reasonably soon after starting to chat, so we can gauge mutual attraction - we will obviously supply pics by return) We're very chatty, sarcastic and a little bit daft - as serious as we are about wanting a third, we don't take life all too seriously outside of work. We have VERY similar tastes in women, so don't worry about one of us being more attracted to you, we're also very body-positive and enjoy women with curves.

Still reading? Ok, let's talk about us:

So M is 37, 6’4”, short dark hair, stubble, refers to himself as having a dad bod, with an average dick that’s girthy and smooth (which V is very complimentary of).

V is 44, 5’8”, curvy ("yes I’ve a tummy on me" she says) natural looking fake tits and absolutely covered in ink, tongue pierced with changeable hair colour.

So you're aware, we do both currently smoke but may be quitting at some point soon, but if you smoke yourself the idea of us all starkers having a cig after cumming lots sounds bloody marvellous!

Still here? Christ almighty you are sounding perfect and you can read!!!

Sooooooo here’s the deal.

We live 100 miles apart and we don’t get to see each other every week, so getting to know you online via group chat on 👻(Snap) is an absolute must before a meeting is planned. Our relationship is important to us so we will only ever meet you when we are together (don't be thinking you can sneak a cheeky meet with one of us beforehand - we've had that before), ideally we'll have a social meeting in a public place to start with, ensuring mutual attraction and also to make sure you're not weirder than us!

Are you still reading this?!!

What are you waiting for?? Pop us a message (If you have read this far, put the word "purple" in your message/DM)

If you get in touch, you'll speak to M at first and if there's a good vibe, V will join us when we start the group chat.