Never know what to say on these things. I’m primarily about 4 things:

• enjoying a good laugh wherever I can, whether that be a comedy gig, riffing through the insane cr*p they put on the tv, bad movies or otherwise

• enjoying good company whenever I can. Though I have some ND issues and struggle to form new connections, when I do, they mean the world to me.

• exploring the world, as a result I’m always up for weekends away in new places and a chance to explore, whether that be here in the UK or abroad.

• sappy as it sounds once you get past my defences i am a hopeless romantic, this doesn’t mean i will bring you flowers every time we meet because I prefer meaningful gestures rather than autopilot ones. When I bring flowers, they will have meaning! I do however get great joy myself in bringing joy into the lives of those I care about in whatever form that may be.

Like most people I’ve had some problems in life, battled addictions and made some bad decisions and as a result haven’t always been a version of myself that I like. I strive to be better, and have been clean for the better part of a decade now. I have done a lot of work to improve myself and a big part of that for me is surrounding honesty, I do therefore tend towards radical honesty as much as possible without being a total ass to people. This can make me a little blunt and direct, which can actually fit in well work wise as I’m an IT consultant… but don’t let that fool you, I’m actually an okay guy.

I consider myself demisexual and need connection to be there before finding myself sexually attracted to someone, this doesn’t always take ages to build but is a lot more about personality than physical form. I also don’t hold to any gender norms, while I have the privilege that comes from being a heterosexual cis male, I am not blind to the difficulties faced by women or by trans people or others and I try to be as supportive as possible. I may not always fully understand as I haven’t lived those lives but I do what I can to be supportive.

I have never been much of a “lad”, always had more affinity with women than other men, so if you are looking for a tough, stoic guy to overpower you 50s movie style then I’m not the person for you. I err towards mutual respect and support and if you can get past my armour then I will openly discuss my feelings.

I am perhaps a little touch hungry and very sexual and do have a kinky side favouring a soft or pleasure dom role on occasion and to some degree a little switch from time to time. I have never been into the kink scene, I don’t judge those that are or have been, it just doesn’t appeal to me personally. That said though I’m also happy with vanilla, depending on what my partners needs and desires are.

I suffer from chronic fatigue which is often hidden from view, though I do use a mobility scooter to mitigate this where possible so if you are put off by such things then once again perhaps not the person for you

Have been poly for just over a year now have one partner additional to my nesting partner to whom I am married and have 3 great kids. My NP has her own small constellation and we date entirely separately from one another.

I’m looking to expand my constellation of connections, whether these be romantic partners or platonic friendships I am open to seeing where it goes.

I have learned that I tend to prefer biting the bullet and meeting people as soon as possible (and as mutually safely as possible) rather than investing months talking before meeting as I’ve found that people’s online personas can differ greatly from their real world ones.

So if you haven’t already been put off by my rather lengthy post then I look forward to hearing from you, feel free to DM or post back and I will reply