Hi

for context 25F here

I went into the doctor this week and this doctor is someone I know personally/work with but also trust and since this was an emergency we just said f* the rules.

I began telling her my sexual history and how i recently just had my first one nightstand and threesome with two strangers and i didn’t ask their sexual history first.

later on in the appointment we were catching up and she asked about my vacation. And i mentioned that it was a great trip, that I met someone, and that I typically meet people when I travel solo overseas.

she jokingly said “YOURE WILD” and I/we laughed it off. in a few months i’ll probably be able to really laugh it off too but it was an open wound so i just force a laugh.

I’ve been acting out sexually for the past 18 months since I broke up with my ex and Idk why. I am a lesbian but around the beginning of the pandemic i became bicurious and started engaging in really risky behavior - as in I could’ve been killed. I feel the need to just list all the shit i’ve done on this throw away account because many people have told me to slow down. Now that i’m looking back over the 18 months, i never planned for it to be that much risk but again i was acting out from unhealthy stress coping.

2019 met a girl in another country and brought her back to my hotel to smoke, drink and chill

In may 2020 I met a guy off reddit we walked back to his i place and just did fingering and a hand job in this basement.

nov 2020 random car hookup with a woman i met on tinder a few hours ago

nov 2020 started dating this girl i met on a dating app. I forgot to ask about her history so I had an STI scare but I was negative. even though the first time i put my self at risk, i stayed exclusive with her for 4months

April/June 2 more handjobs i gave out just from being horny. met them on tinder/ reddit.
On handjob was in an alley behind a restaurant from a man i met on tinder earlier that morning. the second guy i met off reddit at an intersection in my city. I hopped in his car (with a knife in my pocket for protection). we drove to a dark spot downtown and he fingered me/ i gave him a handjob.

July. spent 8 days in a country where being LGBT is a big risk. still found another lesbian via tinder and brought her back to my hotel with me a few nights & slept with her.

flew to another country for 5 days to meet up with the girl I met in 2019. We had sex on an island and did some tourist shit. We were smoking weed, edible magic shrooms, alcohol, and fresh fruit and seafood! great vacation lol she tells me on day 3/4 she’s NEVER been tested (27) i honestly was scared asf but i was high and i ignored it.

sept-november. gave out another handjob and got fingered by a guy outside in a park by a bush to avoid being seen by police around midnight. I met him off reddit. I met another guy off reddit in Nov. who I gave a handjob too and he ate me out

lastly the last week of december I gave a handjob to a guy in his SUV. I met him off reddit as well.

I decided a three someone would be the best way to end my curiosity of being bicurious or a lesbian. I was craving a woman so badly. I met up with a couple for a threesome. That….. confirmed for me I am a lesbian.

but i ended up getting strep throat a few day later. But i didn’t know if it was a co infection w. chlamydia/ gonnorhea

so i went to the doctor i work with and told her about the encounter. We talked about my high risk sexually behavior and i told her I am seriously stopping cold turkey. I am going to abstain from sex in 2022. But now i’m thinking i’ve been doing risky behavior without even realizing it. It doesn’t look good or even make me feel good that another doctor is pointing out my behavior. and then there’s the crowd on this post that will say “you’re a doctor you should know better” …. yeah i do know better. I purposely took a chance and honestly i’m glad strep was the worse of it. I will get retested for hiv in 3 months and put these sexually escapades behind me.

in your opinion is this wild behavior or is it spaced properly?