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why do I feel guilty for considering exposing my abuser??
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I know I'm not alone in this, survivors feel guilty all the time when thinking about exposing or reporting assault/abuse. I've been through therapy, I know it's irrational to feel guilty for bringing on a consequence of my abusers action, but that guilt is stopping me from doing so.

short description, my sister sent me a post showing that my abuser (male cousin) made a pregnancy announcement with his wife. I've been no contact since the abuse stopped, but the fact that he never faced any consequences for what he did is eating at me. and now knowing he will be a father makes me sick to my stomach and I can't stop imagining how terrible that poor baby's life could be. I've posted more descriptive posts on my page if you want to know more feel free to look there...

but now as I ponder exposing him, I think about how terrible it would be for his life to be ruined like that. how terrible his wife might feel if she knew the things he did...how do I get over this? how did you all handle something like this?

looking for stories, help, thought provoking questions, anything really...my therapist is on maternity leave so naturally I turn to the people of reddit lol

Comments
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I’m so sorry that happened to you. This is one of my fears, although I barely have contact with most of my family anyways so that part isn’t as big of a deal.

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Yes I’ve thought about this, being able to know I told her and she can do what she wants with the information

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thank you, I didn't really think posting online could be used against me since reddit is kind of anonymous social media...hmm much to think about

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I want that attitude, he deserves it. but if he loses his wife and job or becomes a sex offender his life won't ever be the same...

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logically I agree....my brain rejects that.tho lol

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I'm sorry you know these feelings too, it's not something I'd ever wish on anyone. if you ever need to talk I'm here for you thanks for making me feel not so alone <3

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My therapist has told me it’s a very common response but tbh I can’t help but feel disgusting about myself because of it.

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Yes, provocative and hypersexual. I feel like I can’t ever stop. Even though I haven’t talked to him in almost 10 years I still think and wonder if he would like certain things about me now and it disgusts me. The idea of him getting in trouble satsfys something in me, but I mostly feel guilty and terrible like he doesn’t deserve it especially cause it’s been years

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Halp. Am stuck on reddit.

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Posted
8 months ago