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How it is being 3?
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A- We (K and I) have been together for a loooong time, but we've only known about tulpamancy for like... 2 years almost, and it has always been just us two.

However, for months we've been thinking that we're not well balanced and that we could greatly benefit from being 3 or 4 (4 is our max... or so we've agreed on). We thought about creating a tulpa but set the idea aside to make sure that it wasn't just a whim (and many other reasons like we weren't sure we had enough reasons to do it, it wasn't the best moment for us, some social situations, etc).

It's been months and now we've picked the idea again. Now we have any reason we could have to do it but we're still a bit hesitant and want to hear others' experiences before (let's say that we're 90% convinced we're doing it but we want to be at least 98%).

Basically, we've always been two, we're very (too) used to the other, we trust the other to death, we know us very well, work well together, etc. and we're not sure how a third person will fit into that.
We probably will still want to have our moment "alone", but that probably won't really happen? Or we're not convinced it will work as well as we'd want.
We're aware that slowly our relationship with this headmate will grow and, the same way we want to have our time "alone" we'll want something similar with said headmate, but again, it's always been just us (I think we're just scared of the change).

Also, body's 20, to a certain point I worry we're going too quickly. It's not like this is "a headmate per decade" but idk, I feel like we'll be opening a door we may not be able to close, if that makes sense. I know our max is 4, but maybe we'll reach that max too soon? Like, we're precipitating stuff?
But K and I have been together for 8 years or so, known about tulpamancy and plurality for 2 years, and had this "third member" on minded for half a year or so. And if we keep thinking about it they'll randomly pop up one day like "stop thinking about me and pay me attention, I exist :V".

K- I have to point out that if we don't do this before the next academic course, we would have to wait a whole year and we would regret it. And one of the reasons we're talking about this again is that next year is going to be notable for us and it would be beneficial to have that third headmate there.

A- And aside from that, the headmate would probably be annoyed to not have existed that year if we do it later while being able to do it now.

Even though we've said all that, we already know that we're doing this, it's just that we don't want to start it with all of that in mind, it feels rude and disrespectful towards that future headmate.

Basically, we want opinions and to know others' experiences of being more than two, how you manage conversations and time together, how's been the growth of the group, etc.

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A, K & N

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Posted
3 years ago