Honestly I just need to get this off my chest, I'm not looking for pity or anything, just a small release from everything. My friends are all living across the country now and we rarely ever talk, my family is super religious so talking to them devolves into (civil) arguments, and all that is left is my cat.

I work as a salary manager at a popular restaurant chain and it is physically, mentally, and emotionally draining. I'm dealing with either upset customers, coworkers, and everything in between nearly my whole day. I get home with just enough time and energy to sleep, scroll through media for a bit and get back to it. My medical debt and car payments are draining most of every last cent I have that doesn't go towards bills anymore, and my teeth are rotting out of my face with a $25k bill looming over my head to fix them.

I like to think I'm a pretty laid back guy, and take everything in stride, but I feel myself slipping more with every day. I have nobody I can vent to without it blowing back in my face. I just need to get this out there. I've tried making friends but I live in a very rural area and have near nothing in common with anyone and severe social anxiety on top of that. There are no jobs near me that can pay me enough to not end up homeless.

I feel alone, empty, and pathetic. I want to live, to sew what my future holds, but I'm terrified it's going to just be more of the same. I don't know how much longer I can hold on before I completely give up, maybe another couple years tops, maybe less.

I don't expect anyone to actually read this honestly, but if you did, thank you.