Idk what to do or how to feel. It’s just such a complicated mess. I, myself, suffer from CPTSD, depression, and anxiety (suicidal ideation is apart of all that) and man am I tired of people only caring bc they’re scared I’m going to kill myself as a reaction.m while right now I’m literally sitting at a bar not wanting to go home bc I’m super conflicted due to so many things that have happened between the guy and me and worrying about my future but feeling like an asshole bc a friend just killed themself.

I’m just so alone and such a failure. I do t want to kill myself, I’m just exhausted with uncertainty and have a lot of things to now figure out but also feel cold hearted that’s my thoughts when a friend just killed themself.