I finally got the job I wanted right near my home, but they aren't paying enough for me to be able to support myself.

I've been desperately trying to get an additional new job and more hours. But, for right now, it's a struggle. I'm making less than $100 a week, I haven't gotten my first paycheck yet, and I'm completely bare of food for a whole week. I've gotten by on free food samples, combining coupons for getting a hamburger and fries for $0.98, and eating half of the meal one day and saving half for the next. Usually fries when they're fresh, and then the burger the next day. I'm struggling hard, but I know it will be worth it if I keep trying. I'm tired of spending all my money just to get to a job and barely get by. Once I can earn working more hours, I'll be ok, I think.

I'm damn good at cooking. Making multiple meals from one item, and more from leftovers. I just need a chance to keep going, some way to keep trying.

I don't know if this is just a rant, or a vent, or just me getting all this off my chest. I just want to survive and be able to be happy. I'm tired of being hungry and worn out all the time. It's not that I need sleep, it's that I'm mentally worn down.

I dunno how to feel. I got the job I wanted, and it's perfect for what I want to do, but I can't feed myself on this. It's me choosing plain rice with maybe some onion and some crumbled bacon for flavor one night, and maybe spending half a buck for a sandwich, with coupons. Making bean soup with dried lentils, and enough powdered spices that it qualifies as a broth. And so on.

I just want to be happier is all, and successful, and doing well. I just hope I can get the energy for it.