I miss him, so much. It hurts like hell that he's gone, and I've lost weight from losing him.

I send him messages, to his email, when I start having a panic attack, or feel sick. He used to calm me down, comfort me, and just spend time with me. I don't have that anymore...

I miss him so much, it hurts to breathe, I get so upset. He meant so much to me, that I've been sick from his passing. I get so upset, I've thrown up, multiple times.

I know I probably wasn't as important to him, as he was to me, but, he made me feel important. Like I mattered to someone.

Just, right now, his former partner hates me. And I guess that's ok. I dunno if he viewed me as a threat or what, but, I made my friend a promise I would care for his mate as much as I cared for him. Even though it hurts like hell.

I, just, I wish he was still here. I feel like my life is a nightmare without him in the world, anymore....