For so long, I've just been taken for granted or mistreated. I've given my partners everything I am, helped them with their traumas, and their problems. Sure, maybe I couldn't buy them the world, but you know what? I gave them peace at night. I think that counts for something, no?

Anyway... I think I'm finally ready to say it.

I'm going to heal. I'm going to heal every single wound, and trauma that I can find. I'm going to be reborn in the flames of my own heart. I'm tired of being taken for granted. I'm tired of always being the healer. It's time... It's time for me to be something else. I'm going to go for it. I'm going to let my full potential shine; I'm finally going to accept what I'm good at. Hell, maybe I'll accomplish something big, right?

Man, I was so tired... For so long. I gave my exes so many chances. I accepted every tantrum, every infidelity, and even every painful word they said. I always thought being empathetic, compassionate and...kind would give me some sort of peace. It has, in a way, but... I think I've practiced it wrong, because I still felt the sting of pain from not speaking up, from allowing things to happen. I sacrificed myself for them, sacrificed my heart, my pain, my boundaries, my dignity.

I went through so much pain... Abuse, physical, mental, emotional. I went through ridicule, through false hopes and lies and manipulation. I've been gaslit so much I started to question my own reality. I ain't no saint, but I sure as hell wasn't a demon either. I put everything into those that I loved. Every scrap of my love, my affection, my time, my soul.

I don't care how much pain I feel anymore. I don't care how many people have hurt me. I don't care how many scars I have anymore. I'm going to follow my heart. I'm going to become stronger and follow my dream. Then, I'm going to pursue her.

It will be my last attempt, but I will make it happen. I tried... I tried so hard to give them happiness and peace, but they never knew how to treat me, and I don't blame them. As a matter of fact, I bow my head to them, for giving me the opportunity of experience. The pain, the anguish, the total destruction of my heart has actually made me stronger, it has helped me reforge myself.

There is one woman... I will pursue her. The one who would howl with me to the moon. Who was connected to nature as I am. Perhaps I will not succeed but I will try. I will prepare and be the best version of myself.

The road ahead will be treacherous, but I no longer fear it. I am unbroken. I am unbreakable now. I hope those that have hurt my heart know that. No amount of pain will stop me EVER again. I will make pain into my strength. It's time to LET GO of that weakness. It's time I showed everyone what I'm made of.

I. AM. UNBREAKABLE.