i (22f) have been with my boyfriend (24m) for almost three years, and for most of it, we’ve had what people would call a “perfect relationship.” we met in college, hit it off quickly, and everything just clicked. our families love each other, we’ve got mutual friends, and for the longest time, i thought he was “the one.”

but over the past few months, something in me has shifted. i can't pinpoint when it started, but now, when we spend time together, i feel disconnected. i don’t look forward to our dates like i used to, and honestly, sometimes i’d rather be alone than with him. it’s terrifying because i know he still loves me with all his heart, and he has done nothing wrong to deserve this. he’s an amazing person, genuinely kind and supportive, but i just don’t feel that spark anymore.

what makes it worse is that i’m terrified of hurting him. he’s hinted at wanting to move in together soon, and i can’t even think about it without feeling trapped. i feel guilty even writing this, but it’s like i’m living a lie every time i smile and tell him “i love you.” i do care about him—i always will—but i don’t think i’m in love with him anymore.

i’ve been avoiding this conversation for weeks, but the more i wait, the more guilty i feel. i don’t want to break his heart, but i also don’t want to stay in a relationship just because i’m scared of hurting him. i don’t know what to do.

TL;DR: i don’t think i love my boyfriend anymore, but i’m scared to break his heart and end things.