For context, im a 21 year old man and i suffer from a lot of severe mental issues.

Lately I've been extremely stressed out and overworked as i quit my job awhile ago and the job that was supposed to hire me is so fucking incompetent they completely fucking forgot about the fact they employed me and hadn't put me on the schedule so long i lost the job, so now im job hunting and its not going all that well

I don't have any education so only low end jobs will hire me and even then with my mental issues and with what i use to cope most places see me as a liability and will not go further with my applications.

So that's 1 stresser, second is just my home/family life. I am currently in order to not need rent taking care of our 6 dogs the dishes for 5 people and the litterbox of 3 cats. This isn't even mentioning the shit my family puts me through.

I have had things thrown at me been thrown into walls and have the door to the bathroom pounded on if i spend more than even a minute in the bathroom so i can't even shower all that often. I don't even mind not showering yes i hate it but its the fact im SCREAMED at for stinking and being unhygienic that fucks with me.

My family constantly scream at me and get onto my case for being "fat and lazy" even though no matter wtf i do im screamed at for it and my family are moving and not bringing me specifically because in their own words "everybody wants us to kick you out because nobody likes having you here" like, wtf? It pisses me off so fucking much i hate it. Im boutta fucking snap i can't fucking handle this shit no more.

I can barely function on my own and I'm so fucking done with everything and its not like there's much i can do to just turn it all around, i can't take my meds cuz i need to conserve them for emergencies and when my suicidal tendencies kick back up. I can't eat or drink anything without being screamed at over it and like i can't even relax cuz time not spent stressing about putting in 20 apps a minute and or during chores is time being a fatass to seemingly everyone around me and i just can't fucking jandle it anymore.

Idfk what to do anymore, I've tried everywhere i could possibly apply for that i could physically fucking handle and it just fucking wont cut me some slack, all im getting is ignored and screamed at and im just trying to not seriously hurt myself but it's getting harder and harder every day i go on trying to hold on to something idek what im trying to cling to but im starting to question if it's even worth it.

Idk wtf to do and it just feels like my entire life is just fucking crumbling around me i hate it