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So back in my hey day, let’s say nineties to keep it simple, I was an exotic animal trainer for movies and television shows. There was a small production from a big company which I will not name and the gist was a man gets lost in the arctic and bonds with a starving polar bear to survive. Apparently common sense was invented in the 2000s, because the director of this film, unbeknownst to me had requested a starving polar bear to keep the film realistic. Now I wasn’t no polar bear expert, just knew how to deal with big cats and bears. Polar bears were hard to come by though so I was least experienced with them. So when I done opened up that there cage and a hungry, metric ton of fur and claws come runnin out I started shootin. Couldn’t put him down none just chased him another direction. He took out 14 crew members and a tour of 45 people visiting the movie studio. I ain’t never been back since but I can promise you if I had cgi, god damn I woulda used it.
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