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What’s the point in even repenting anymore if I know I’m using Jesus just to use a “get out of Hell free card”?
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I don’t wanna lose hope. But at the back of my mind, I feel like if I don’t go back to him, or don’t think about him afterwards, he would just leave me in the darkness and I don’t want that! I turned away from him because I’m scared and it’s kinda like I don’t trust him. Man… idk what to do anymore, I try my best and the worst always happens. I’ve even been thinking of taking my own life to meet him in person and apologize and hope everything goes Alr. But I don’t want to do that! I want to live! I want to experience life! But sometimes I feel like the wisest choice is the cowardly way out, and I feel scared everyday, everyday I wake up, everyday I go to school, every day I go home and relax after school. I feel so restless and I can’t take a break. I’m not looking for sympathy, I just want to get this out of my chest.

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God reveals himself to everyone and those with ears to hear, eyes to see, and hearts to receive accept him.

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Posted
1 month ago