I got my license last year around July and collectively driven for roughly 8 months. I started out with having big anxiety over just going through the mentor phase because I hated being a passenger due to being in 5 car accidents all of which ive been the passenger. Mentor phase unfortunately requires sometimes for you to sit and watch or for them to drive.

I get through that and then realize I had a great fear when going around curves or even slightest of gust going over 25mph. The natural shifts of the truck makes it feel to me like something major will happen. Not so great a fear that I react stupidly or do anything to put anyone in jeopardy but I will slow down to the point other drivers will blow pass me and cuss me out or look at me crazy. Like I would do 55 in a 65 or like 40 in a 55 It's super embarrassing.

I then slowly start to get accustomed to doing curves properly. But no other weather conditions can be in play or I'm back to square one.

I'm so frustrated with myself with this fear I have. Like today it was higher winds then I'm okay with. My trailer was empty and 35mph gust. I realized I wasn't able to continue on my route and was trying to find proper parking. I get off the freeway and right in front of me as I'm getting ready to turn I see out the corner of my eye a van flies through the light I'm at and smacks into the car turning on the right of me. My anxiety went through the roof.

I instantly find the nearest place I could park my truck and call my driver leader to remove me from my loads for the day.

I shouldn't be having to do that. I know there are things that come with this profession. I know everyone says confidence comes over time. I just feel like I'm so behind where I need to be and by now should be at a better place in terms of my driving abilities.

TLDR: I feel the amount of experience under my belt should equate to me having less fear with driving by now. Got extra rattle by a car accident in front of me today, needed to vent.