My (35M) wife (31F) and I are talking about having a MFF threesome. We both come from a fundamental religious background with a lot of shame and legalism around sex and intimacy. Extremely toxic and unhealthy purity culture was just the water we swam in through our teen years and even into our mid/late 20's.

We began unpacking these things, both individually and together, both in therapy, both working hard on ourselves. We have excellent communication and we feel extremely safe with each other. Over the last few years, we've both brought out the "deep dark" things we've suppressed or kept in the dark for so long. Kinks, fantasies, lots of new things in the bedroom -- it's truly been an incredible journey.

A few months ago, my wife confided in me that fooling around with another woman has been a bucket list item for her for a long time, but up until recently, she's never given the fantasy a moment of consideration.

Of course the idea of girl on girl action is extremely arousing to me, but I spent some real time and effort truly considering where I'd stand on my wife touching another woman and being touched herself -- like actually considering.

We are interested in this enough to take the first steps, make some accounts, post some things... we've done a lot (!!) of reading on this sub and others.

We want to do this, the idea is so exciting to us. There isn't any specific concern, but there is a general unease or anxiety about keeping our marriage safe. We think this is a remnant from our background, but we'd want to take things slow so we can carefully evaluate as we go.

We love each other deeply, our relationship is the most important thing to us, and there are a lot of horror stories out there of marriages being destroyed after another person is brought into the bedroom. These weigh on us.

We know the rules --

• You have to do this together, for each other

• You can't "fix" other problems in your marriage this way -- that's a recipe for disaster

• Stay far away from friends, co-workers, etc.

• You have to over-communicate, over-share, talk about everything

• Set boundaries and stick to them

• Think of every act you could possibly do or be done to you and develop boundaries and rules based on those

• Take things slow

So I guess that brings me to why I'm making this post. I guess I just wanted to talk about this, sharing our background, why we are excited and breathless in anticipation, but also nervous.

We want to do this, but we want to take it slow -- maybe very slow, do it right, and above all, ensure our marriage is not only kept safe, but actually enhanced by this experience.

Any thoughts on this? Thanks!

PS: We know it's hard to find a woman to join, we're ok with a long wait, we have a few ideas of how to find someone eventually.

Edit: Both wife and I have access to this account and may comment here. Thanks.