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Here are some great ways to bring up the topic of threesomes with your parter, and tips for overall easy communication about all the different aspects of threesomes!
First, "How Do I Bring It Up With My Partner?" So I always say that if you can't ask something without giggling or feeling nervous, then you aren't ready to. I understand it can make you nervous when bringing up your fantasies to your partner; but remember that this is your partner. You chose them. You're together with them for a reason. A good partner shouldn't be judgy or disgusted with you for opening up to them about your thoughts and fantasies - so find some time (outside of sexy time) to simply ask, "Hey, I would love to share with you something I've been thinking about privately. What do you think about having a threesome?". This is the best way to ask because you aren't being coy or beating around the bush about anything. Just say it! Get it out in the open and see what your partner thinks about it!
If they say YES! Then you guys can start talking about all the details together! However if the answer is NO, then you shouldn't try and "convince" them otherwise. They told you their answer; just like you expected respect from them when you opened up about your fantasies, they expect the same respect from you if they tell you NO.
If the answer is hesitant, or they say they need to think about it, the best thing you can do is to give them that time. Ask again in 1 month - yes, wait a month - and see what the response is. If they are still hesitant, ask if they gave it thought and what their concerns are. Talk it out with your partner. Address their concerns and find solutions together. If the answer turns out to be NO, then accept that answer and leave it alone.
TALKING ABOUT BOUNDARIES & CONSENT!
Again, the EASIEST way to talk about everything is to JUST SAY IT! If you just outright say exactly what you mean, then there is no confusion, and everything is clearly laid out. This goes for talking about ANYTHING with ANYONE! Examples:
"Would you like to use protection during Oral as well?"
"Hickeys: Yes or No?"
"Do you like spanking? If so, how hard?"
"Do you want to do any bi play? If so, what do you like and not like to do?"
"How's this speed? Faster, slower or stay the same?"
Asking this way (plainly & simply) makes everything clear for every person involved. What you DON'T want is any confusion around who doesn't want what and if you should or shouldn't do something - that's what leads to trouble.
Got any good tips for Clear Communication? Comment below!
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