Good morning/afternoon/evening.

Some of you may have seen the post this morning about Edge play and what it looks like to someone and after commenting, the ever lovely u/CharlieTKP requested a post about my take on consensual abuse.

To preface, all our scenes involve me getting the gasms, whether it's CNC, psychological or physical consensual abuse. I'm also not going to delve into the ins and outs of CNC because otherwise we'll be here all day with that topic included and also I feel it is pretty self explanatory in how that falls under consensual abuse.

After discussing this with my Owner this morning we narrowed it down to consensual abuse being how I feel in the moment in relation to the things being done. Basically anything where my pleasure is not the primary focus of the scene or the thing happening to me.

Mentally it can be the difference between 'you're such a good girl the way you cum from the pain I give you' and being told how fucked up it is that I get off on it and having me question what it says about me, or telling me that even if I pass out he won't stop, crying will only turn him more, etc etc.

Physically it can be something like him walking in and taking off his belt and demanding I bend over because he wants to lay stripes on my ass and I don't have a say in the matter, or like yesterday where after we'd beaten me to the point we broke skin, he decided he was going to poke at my bruises because he wanted a pain reaction from me and to be smug about the fact that he Owns me and has the freedom to use me in that way.

It all ties back to making me feel like he is my only source of worth. That my pleasure only comes from what he decides to do to me and that I'm a depraved little whore for finding enjoyment in it. It's reminders that I am his to do as he pleases with and he has the right to do that in whatever way he so chooses to.

That might not look like consensual abuse to everyone, but it's how we view it in our dynamic outside of making me feel like a straight up victim.

This ended up way longer than I intended so if you made it this far then have a gold star. But that's enough requested insight from me and some of the entirely wonderful torture I receive from my entirely wonderful Owner.