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Dear Santa,
How are you? I am fine.
First, I have a bone to pick with you. Remember when I was six and I asked for Equestrian Barbie that came with a horse and a riding crop and you sent me Executive Barbie with the briefcase and running shoes? That sucked. I’m still kinda pissed.
Second, here’s your chance to make it up to me. I want a sandwich. A John Wick and Fitzwilliam Darcy sandwich. If you can only get Jason Bourne, that’s cool but Mr. Darcy is nonnegotiable. I know what you’re thinking. Yes, I’ve been a good girl. I went a whole week without grinding on the arm of the couch.
I really hope you come through for me this year.
Say Hi to Mrs. Claus. Do you two ever do butt stuff?
Sincerely,
Kay Books
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- 4 years ago
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