(One day my friend annoyed me so I wrote a small fanfic about her and the grinch🐀🐀)

What is that? What sounds in the wind. Such terrible cries lie over me and muffle my thoughts. How dare they. My head's turning green. My thoughts, my lips, my eyes, my hips. A searing pain travels down my spine. Ouch. Who's licking me? Why is it so spiky. Green is so not my colour.      Nicole awakens to find her rats jumping on her breasts, trying to bring on lactation. "What are you doing?" She asks them. There is no reply. Continuing to suckle, she pushes them off in hopes of relief. Not from the pain, but from the enjoyment and pleasure she gets from the little kisses on her lady muscle. She moans as they crawl back up her chest and lie on her nipples.      There were four in total: Remi, Trixie-Bell, Charles, and Evita, and they were very eager animals. They never did what animals normally enjoy. Eating out of the bin and finishing leftovers, activities that most rats enjoy, was something these fancy rats simply didn't care for.     It is important to mention that Evita has only 3 legs. Many a time did she escape into the cold and barren Whoville plains. Ultimately it was Nicole's fault, for she herself had left her bedroom window open, thus making a gateway to the outside. How did she lose the leg? Well we don't know, but Nicole suspects it was a grinch bite. I know that sounds funny, Grinches don't exist, but Nicole knows all too well that they in fact do. She wakes up most nights perturbed at the things her mind makes up in her dreams. Countless visions of green flood her mind, showing no sign of stopping. Sometimes she wonders whether she'll ever meet her provoker, that is, in person.     Able-bodied and bold, Nicole descends the staircase, taking care not to step on her little children. She is but a girl of 17, and has much to learn, yet she knows how to take care of herself and her little family. The fridge opens and to her joy, it still contains her favourite delicacy: unseasoned 2-day-old white turkey. It's a bit fluffy, but after having scraped of the mould it tasted devine.     She took her plate to the dining table and carefully picked up her rats and nestled them into the shape of the wood. They too were to dine on a delicacy, but one of mouldier qualities.    They promptly finished their food and started with the daily chores including: sweeping, bed-making, and rat-pampering. She also made sure to clean out the rat trays which line her window-sill. They are, after all, rather prone to getting covered in rat shit.     After having done this, they all leave the house in their winter coats, hoping to catch a glimpse of the northern lights on their way to work. Naturally, what with their shorter limbs, the rats stray behind quite a bit but Nicole is a kind and warm-hearted woman and so seeing this, she collects her kids and places them in her hood, optimistically smiling at the day to come.     Twenty minutes pass and all is well. She reaches her place of work, a small hunting company north of the village at the foot of Mount Crumpit. She is ever wary around these parts due to the rumours of a great being she knows as the Grinch. However scared she is, she is also intrigued by the majesty that this creature may be.     Her first task is hunting down 15 white rabbits for the Whoville Christmas hat competition. Rabbits are a tricky one as they are really fast. Keeping up with them on icy ground can prove to be a gargantuan feet, but nevertheless Nicole has done it before.     As usual she brings her ratty companions with her, as to cover more ground and have more eyes on the lookout. Despite being related to their hasty charge, the rats find pleasure in the downfall of their cousins, always hoping to view the blood trail after Nicole fires her rounds.     Suddenly, and unexpectedly, she happens upon a set of footprints, footprints larger than any she has seen in all of her 17 years. She yelps with intrigue and squeals with fear, for they fill themselves out with greenish fur. "What could these belong to?" questioned Nicole. "Who could possess such dreamy footsies?" She starts to moan in time with the wind, graciously accepting it's pull deep into the deep, dark wood.      She follows these large foot imprints and before she knows it, she finds herself embedded in trees, snow, and hail. She loses herself betwixt the branches and hears cries of motherless birds which remind her of her own upbringing. All of these emotions, along with her arousal from the footprints' scent, brings her down to her knees where she starts to weep blood, filling the soil with her own biological fertiliser. She calls to the being that owns these footprints: "Whoever you are, meet me. I am open to your judgement and daren't quarrel with you."      Then, the noises start to come. First from the east and then from the south. Her back buckles and she joins her hands in unholy prayer to the Grinch. "Please save me oh green one. I am alone in this world and require aid. I am ripe, and pure, and good. I have much to offer, and much to take. Bring me salvation and I shall be your foot slut for years to come if you'll just save me from this hell"     Suddenly, a tree is felled to her right, and a set of gleaming yellow eyes emerges. The beast does not speak, nor does it move. It just watches the girl, perpetually.    Nicole picks up a piece of the Grinch's fur from the footprint, sticks out her tongue, and places the piece of hair onto her slimy muscle and swallows, all the while she pulls up her blouse and presents her bare chest to him.    The howling stops, the winds die down, the Grinch protrudes into the clearing.