Had a zoom call with my therapist that i’ve been attending for months now. She and I got on well and i’ve been having a down period recently. Her therapy includes mindfulness practice and looking inwards (including any feelings, sensations in the body). Sometimes i feel like whatever feeling or sensation i have doesn’t have words attached. Sometimes they do. Whenever i do talk about what words they have or what meaning i attach them to, sometimes i feel like they’re being judged. Like i’m BS-ing? When i don’t really know, its what i think i’m feeling but like i don’t know. Sometimes i’m not comfortable with the “what does your inner higher self say” type of discussions because i find them difficult to visualize/talk about. I suppose it’s like going to a doctor with non-specific pain, it’s hard to say where the pain is, what kind of a pain, how long it’s been there etc. Anyways, i was on the zoom call and got mad, got frustrated. I know that because of the down period i’m having, i could have been directing all my feelings towards her. I think i also exploded because i just felt pushed to talk about sensations in my body that i can’t find the meaning to but am asked to talk about them. I broke down, cried, told her i felt judged, told her i didn’t believe she cared, told her some statements she made sounded more like i’m being reprimanded. She did seem upset too. I know she means well, she’s trying to help. I didn’t speak for a long time and told her i wanted to stop the call. She didn’t hang up so i said bye and left the call. I texted her an apology today. She didn’t respond. I don’t feel ready for another session. But at the same time, i’m having a tough time. Have i lost my therapist’s support?