I haven’t posted here before or read many posts on here so I apologize if this isn’t the right place for this

I’ve watched a lot of videos and read a lot of articles as well as posts (I don’t really know how to explain the years of content and information I’ve consumed just out of interest in mental health and psychology so I feel like what I said downplays it) and just seen a million things involving therapy and whatnot

Because of that, I’ve heard about basically every technique and coping or management skill for the problems/issues I have. I feel like with how I usually am that none of these will work because even if I want to go to therapy, I’m too self aware and too aware of these topics that I would just subconsciously push against them or ignore it as something that won’t do anything for me because I’ve heard about it before, and I tend to be someone who does that whether I want to or not

I feel like anything a therapist tells me, I’ll have already heard a hundred times online from researching a lot about this topic and being aware of it

I don’t know if this post makes sense. I want to get help but I feel like with how my brain/behaviour/whatever is that I mentally won’t listen to anything a therapist says because I’ve already heard it so much that it would sound like a broken record and would shove it aside as unimportant info so to speak

I also have had bad experiences before with psychiatrists that now make me constantly question whether someone is even qualified or knows what the hell they’re even talking about and if (everything else aside) I should even listen to them in the first place

I already have to get past the mental barriers of it costing a lot, being vulnerable and open with a stranger, and worries that they aren’t even knowledgeable on anything

Plus, if I talk about anything, my brain gets stuck on the conversation later and I just feel worse than if I just ignored it and never spoke about the issue in the first place

I know therapists themselves oftentimes will go to therapy so maybe this won’t be a problem but I still have worries about this regardless because it’s seemed that my whole life, anything that has helped the majority of people never works for me because I’m too stubborn (even unintentionally) and I hate it

I know with how I am that I’ll likely ignore anything a therapist even says even though I want to get help