Throwaway account because I’m paranoid if him even connecting this back to me.

My husband and I have been together for over 5 years, married for one and we have three kids between us. Before I met him I was VERY sexually active and adventurous to the tune of several people a week in the form of singles, groups, couples, etc. I would not say I have an addiction insomuch as I can (lately anyway) go long stretches without any sex at all and be perfectly happy. When we got together it didn’t take long for me to realize that my husband is way more sexually conservative than myself. Being together is so vanilla it’s killing me. I’ve tried to get him to ramp up the choking, biting, dirty talk, anything, but it’s just sad to watch let alone participate. I’m not proud of this, but the most satisfying sex we’d had was when he saw some flirty messages I sent a random guy and he thought I cheated on him. The middle of that same night I woke up to him pinning me to the bed to have his way with me.

That plus the general boredom has had me thinking for some time about wanting to try to hook up with some couples. I think it would be a huge turn-on for both of us. The problem is, he’s never really expressed interest in anything outside of “normal” sex and I’m afraid if I try to bring it up he’d get mad or start to look down on me as some kind of jezebel lol

Do I even attempt to bring it up or just accept my vanilla existence?

Btw, if he was totally not interested I would 100% respect that. At the end of the day I love him and our relationship and would risk it for a freer sexual lifestyle

Update: I took what everyone said to heart and agreed that right now the best thing to do was to try to have a honest conversation about what my/our kinks are and try to spice up our love life first. To that end, I downloaded the spicer app as suggested and nonchalantly sent my husband the link with a naughty face thinking it would get him asking questions. Well…fast forward this morning we….hooked up with our first couple! Hahaha I kid I kid. Fast forward this morning he still hasn’t accepted the link request, just smirked at me and left for work. So I’d say womp womp 🤷‍♀️ I guess if he doesn’t accept it soon or at least bring it up I’ll try to slide it into conversation myself

Update: For those still following, my husband has acknowledged getting an invite to the app and downloaded but has yet to put in any of his fetishes despite me directly asking. With each passing hour I get less horny and more angry/frustrated