How do people relax and enjoy themselves when every interaction seems so fraught with minefields, rules, and interruptions? My husband and I have met up with a few couples for a few "play dates" each and everyone seems to have a wonderful time, except me. I am finding it hard to enjoy myself physically when there is a lot of starting and stopping to "check in" and rules that limit any sort of connection (no intimate or affectionate touching, no kissing, no looking at each other for too long, the other spouses must maintain physical contact so must stop and reposition frequently, exactly equal attention must be given to both partners, etc.). I want other people to be relaxed and feel secure and have fun, but I can't fathom actually "finishing" when I know I will likely have to stop every few minutes, awkwardly coordinate positions, have zero physical/mental/emotional connection with anyone, and feel constantly nervous about breaking other couples' litanies of ever-changing rules. They are all lovely couples and I don't want to jeopardize any relationships or hurt anyone's feelings, but I can't fathom having an orgasm less than a minute after everyone had to break apart to have a discussion...and no one else seems to notice. Do people just get used to it? Am I just spoiled by all of my awesome orgy experiences?