We’ve been in the lifestyle for over a year and have a pretty good range of experience at this point with couples, single ladies and single men. One of the things we’ve noticed is that when we start a conversation with a single lady the more than likely outcome will be that she’ll either ghost, flake out on meeting or noncommittal about meeting.

Now don’t get me wrong: It’s overwhelming to be a single lady in the lifestyle. You’re inundated with match requests, messages etc. You have to be ultra careful when meeting strangers. You have almost unlimited choices with what couples you have the option to meet/play with.

Also, there’s always the chance that some disgusting, sad freak of a guy is posing as a single woman and you’re being catfished.

However, we’ve had cases (an annoying amount which is why I’m asking) where we’ve been chatting away for maybe even two days, everyone is attracted to each other, etc and when it comes up to “hey want to meet for a drink? No expectations” there’s a good chance you’ll get one of the above outcomes.

Single ladies: why do you do this? Is it there are many single women on the lifestyle apps and they’re curious and just in the end want to get off on the idea of playing with a couple but are not serious? We have met with single women before - it’s not that everyone is like this - but seriously what is this? It’s bizarre behavior from a grown adult. There are plenty of other apps where you can go for sexting or whatever. Why waste someone’s time? Do you not have anything better to do with your time?

I know couples do this too, and single guys get it a lot from couples - but wtf is it with single women and this behavior? It happens way, way more with them than couples seeing couples. We don’t even seek them out because we prefer couples (but sure we are happy to see one) and they are the ones that are approaching us because we have learned not to bother!

Single ladies: if you’re not serious about meeting a couple or you’re just flirting with the idea of it in your head, go away until you are ready. Go chat on some other app or read cheap erotica from Amazon.