This true personal reflection probably sounds embarrassing, it's not. I think it is probably a very common story for many dudes, and in fact, some may not have transformed their penis yet... Hopefully this will help, if so, leave a comment or up-vote.
When I was a teenager, I thought sex was about my orgasm, like as fast as possible. The goal was to cum, so get to the goal as fast as possible. Not 2 thoughts about the girl's orgasm crossed my mind.
Eventually, I learned that girls liked oral, but I thought it was just to 'get them started'... yah, I know.. dunce.
When I was a young man, I met my wife (now 20 years), and the first time we had sex, she orgasm-ed while riding me! WOW> It was amazing for us both, we actually orgasm-ed together our first time. I didn't even know what a woman's orgasm was until then. I wanted more!
For the first 15 years of our marriage, somehow I thought that if I licked her enough or held back my orgasm long enough, it would make her cum, and then, I could finally cum. WRONG THINKING: See, it was still about making myself cum...
After many years of experimenting, I eventually learned that her orgasm was not tied to my holding back... quite the opposite, me enjoying myself turned her on! We developed a great sex life as I finally learned all the things that work together to help her orgasm, featuring my tongue. However, my goal was to get her off... so I can get off.
Then, we entered the lifestyle. I thought using my tongue in the same way I use on my wife would work for all women. I was wrong, every woman likes different pressure, different rhythm, etc.. I never expected my penis (just a tad above average in size) would be of much help in making a woman I barely know orgasm, so oral first, then I get to have my fun with my penis... Anyways, see, the goal had not changed in 20 years, give her pleasure in order to get to MY orgasm. And by the way, many women can cum from penetration, some of them over and over again (I learned this in the lifestyle too).
After doing this for a few years, and really only pretty recently, I have finally learned that my Penis can be used as a pleasure giver, not just a pleasure taker. What does that mean? It means, it's not about my orgasm at all. My penis is a very useful tool to help give her pleasure, and that's when it finally clicked. My penis (and really my mind) had transformed...
Sex is about giving your partner pleasure... using all the tools at hand (thanks to my wife for helping me learn so many!). One of those tools is my penis, and when I use it as a pleasure giving device, wow... women respond (especially my lovely wife).
So, on to the tip! <-- see what I did there, just the tip...
Tip 1: Use all the Tools - I have found that combining lots of pleasure giving techniques work great together... Massage, kissing, caressing, penetration, all working together. My favorite technique is cunnilingus with slight penetration, and back to cunnilingus, and back... drives her wild!
Tip 2: Mind Fuck - What's the most sensitive sex organ? the mind. Dirty talk, story telling, deep moaning, and mental stimulation work wonders and are a tool not to be forgotten! I like saying what I'm doing while I'm doing it as the best dirty talk. "I'm licking you so deep... I'm just barely inside you.. etc.".
Tip 3: Angles - No matter your size, you can probably get more moans by angling your penis towards her gspot. It's in just a little and up (towards her belly/clit). So, if on top, position your body lower and fuck upwards... if behind, get higher and fuck downwards. Give it a try... and here's the AHAH: USE YOUR PENIS TO MASSAGE HER G-SPOT. Transformation complete!
I have more tips too, but this post was already long. I'll write more if the guys (or gals) like this one.
now, get out there (when it's safe) and GIVE some pleasure!
Or at least, use my tip on your wife ( see what I did there :) )
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