I came across a post about this, and maybe it was in the swingers r4r subreddit instead of here. Couldn't find it. But the OP was a woman ranting about how hard it is to find guys willing to commit to her GH fetish. I've heard this before, and from all avenues too (i.e. gay guys, single women, str8 guys, female halves of kinky couples, curious guys, etc). What I want to say to them is this: have you no idea how awkward it is to get sexual pleasure without having the slightest idea of who or what is doing it?

Now, in no way am I shaming people for having a GH fetish. That's fine and all. What I'm saying is, how hard is it for those folks who get frustrated over it to temper expectations and recognize the following caveats that come with the whole GH scene:

• if physical attraction or chemistry means anything to you, throw that out the door because you're not finding it here
• whoever is on the other side is in total control, and could completely bail on you or leave you out to dry. I once met someone who claimed to be a woman, in an effort to try this out. They slid me notes under the door and made infinite demands (e.g. "take off your pants," "take off your undies," "no, do it again but more slowly,"). After like 7 minutes, I got so fed up I just left. Whatever that person was doing was clearly NOT the typical GH scenario. But the anonymity involved with this fetish can easily lend itself to more crap like that happening that ends up being a giant cock tease.
• allows for zero discussion of STI status or sexual history. Not saying other forms of swinging are better, just saying the usual desired anonymity of this scene further limits that, making it risky for some.
• is a huge draw for catfishers who have zero interest in actually meeting, again, given anonymity involved.
• is a huge draw for phishers, who are blatantly deceiving those on the other end. Can you imagine how many closeted bi/gay or curious guys out there are posting right now for a GH scenario supposedly as a hot female, using fake pics to lure responses? I'm not promoting homophobia, just saying this scene is a breeding ground for this kind of fake out, which is hugely disingenuous and makes it harder for those who are honest GH lovers.

If you keep that all in mind, maybe, just maybe you'd understand why people are a little skeptical, guarded, or afraid to commit to something like this. I get that some GH aficionados are willing to meet up casually and have some dialogue leading up to the GH play, but that's a lot less common than those who want to hide behind a wall/door from the get go with little to no conversation.