I (M51) and my wife have been swingers for a very short time (a few months), and since we decided to take this step and entered this world, our perception of couples who practice swinging has obviously changed. They’re no longer the "rare exceptions" who consensually have sex with other people’s husbands and wives, but... the norm.

Before taking this big step (and before I ever remotely suspected that my wife might even consider the lifestyle) there were times, during all-male gatherings, when the topic of swinging would come up. I have a fairly small circle of long-time, libertarian-leaning friends, and the general sentiment was one of disbelief that a couple could be so open-minded as to consider swinging and, in general, there was also a sense of envy toward them.

Now, my wife and I have mutually agreed that this has to remain our secret, so we’ve decided not to share the fact that we’ve become swingers, not even with our closest and open-minded friends. However, I have to admit that the temptation to do so, with a very small and carefully selected group of friends, is strong.

For example, during our last get-together (again only men), the topic came up again (absolutely not brought up by me). A friend mentioned swingers as "those people who meet in parking lots to swap wives." At that moment, I had to hold myself back from explaining that carsex is just a small and extreme part of the swinging lifestyle. But then, of course, they would’ve asked how I happen to know so much about it.

In short, while I have absolutely no intention of trying to draw them into the swinging world, keeping this secret from them, friends with whom I openly discuss virtually every other aspect of my married life, is honestly weighing on me a bit...

What's your experience ? Have you told some of your closest and open-minded friends, about your new lifestyle ??