Wife and me are dipping our toes into the LS. So far we've got some dates lined up with single females as well as a lesbian couple. My wife is bi and I'm straight. We are also mingling with one other husband/wife duo and seeing how that plays out. Here's the thing - I cannot wrap my head around allowing some dude to fuck my wife. I'm not into any cuck play, hot wifing, etc. I know I have a lot of trauma from males growing up. I am a very gentle natured man and was often abused and used by these more assertive/aggressive men. I only have one male friend and he's alot like me if that paints a picture. We went dancing with this male/female couple and I had the most visceral reaction just watching him touch my wife. I had to walk away and regather myself. I know how trivial that is but my feelings are my feelings. I mean I'm not even against the innocent stuff like kissing (she did kiss him later) and that didn't bother me - but mostly I think because I didn't see it. My wife is adamant that if we swap we stay in the same room so that we can have the experience together, bond, and hopefully grow closer. She also feels like it would be more fun/intimate because we could do stuff all together... And in some ways, I agree. It does sound nice to have my wife there rather than not. I would like those things - if I felt I could handle it. However, more deeply, I feel It is the exact opposite for me. I don't want to hear their noises, observe their interaction, or know anything at all about what happened. I don't want to compare. I just don't want to know. She wants us to start with soft swapping and work our way up to it. And if I do that, I don't think I'll be able to look at her. Like all I'll want to do is focus on what's infront of me and ignore my wife. I don't feel threatened by women in the same way even though my wife is bi - I've always gotten along better with women anyway. It's just men. I'm all for dudes who are turned on by the thought and stuff - even wish I could maybe be one of those guys so I could just move forward. But I'm not. My wife told me that if we swing for awhile without her getting any dick, she'll grow resentful, which makes sense. And I'm not sure... maybe thats the path forward. Hit up the unicorns and women couples for awhile and then bounce once we've had enough fun. But I definitely feel like I could be missing out on a whole lot of opportunities because of my hangup. Just don't know how to get "past" it.