1. Naughty (S)Nog: A classic eggnog with a “twist” of your favorite liqueur.

Ingredients: • 4 cups milk • 1 cup heavy cream • 1 cup of sugar, baby!- • 5 egg yolks • 1 cup rum, bourbon, or brandy (or all three, depending on the party vibe)

Instructions: a. Heat the milk, cream, and sugar until warm. b. Whisk the egg yolks and slowly add the warm milk mixture to temper. c. Add your “liquid courage” and serve chilled. d. Garnish with whipped cream and a wink.

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1. Open Relationship Salad: Where everyone brings something to the table. Ingredients: • Mixed greens (newbies) (spinach, arugula, kale) • Cherry tomatoes (halved—like the couples) • Cucumber ribbons (to keep things hetero-flexible) • Pomegranate seeds (for that touch of passion) • Dressing: Honey mustard vinaigrette (sweet and spicy). Instructions: Toss lightly, but ensure everyone gets a bit of everything!

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1. Partner-Swapped Pigs in a Blanket: Classic appetizers with a spicy dip to keep things exciting. Ingredients: • giant sausages (7 inches) • Crescent roll dough • Jalapeño or sriracha mayo for dipping Instructions: a. Wrap the sausages in crescent rolls. b. Suck until golden brown. c. Pair with “fiery” dipping sauces to set the mood. Swallow whole.

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1. Key Party Casserole: You don’t know what’s in it, but it’s worth a try. Ingredients: • 1 lb ground beef from a strong bull • 1 cup mixed vegetables • 2 cups cooked pasta • Cream of mushroom soup. You know what I mean. • Shredded cheese Instructions: a. Brown the beef and mix with veggies, soup, and pasta. b. Top with cheese and bake at 375°F until bubbly. c. Serve hot (wearing lingerie) and see who “swaps” for seconds.

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1. Ménage à Trois Mashed Potatoes: Three kinds of potatoes, mashed together in perfect harmony.

Ingredients: • 2 russet/russian potatoes (Russian girls are hot) • 2 super sweet potatoes • 2 purple potatoes (think: the color of your boyfriend’s dick) • Butter, cream, and garlic

Instructions: a. Boil all potatoes until tender. b. Mash together with butter, cream, and roasted garlic. c. Season with salt and pepper, and enjoy the “blend.”

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1. “Everyone’s Invited” Fondue: Cheese, chocolate, or both—your choice! Ingredients: • Cheese fondue: Gruyere, Emmental, wine, and garlic • Chocolate fondue: Dark chocolate BBC, cream, and a splash of liqueur • Dippers: Bread, fruit, marshmallows Instructions:
2. Melt ingredients in a fondue pot.
3. Let your guests take turns dipping and sharing their favorites. Sharing is Caring.

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1. Swingin’ Gingerbread Men: Decorate to reflect the guest list! Ingredients: • Gingerbread cookie dough • Frosting and candies for decoration Instructions:
2. Bake gingerbread cookies in all shapes (preferably dick shape) and sizes.
3. Let guests decorate them to “represent” themselves or their preferences.

Pro Tip: Set the mood with sultry holiday music and a dessert bar where everyone can “mix and mingle.”