Me(32f) and my partner (38m) are interested in swinging/swapping/or adding a 3rd. We are both bisexual but we're not "open" so we're looking for a discreet hookup but it seems to be nearly impossible to find someone who matches what we're looking for (which I'm not going to go into in this post). We're also both demi and do want to get to know our hookups at least briefly before engaging (even though we're not looking for a poly relationship just causual fun). So we had the idea to just go out for a nice night out and try to pick someone up but how do we know if someone would be interested are there any signs or signals we could use? We know about the black ring but are worried that its too common knowledge to be discreet about in the event we just so happened to run into someone we knew while out (also does that actually work?) Advice please.