So my husband and I are still very new to the swinging life. Weve gone to a local swingers club a few times and had a couple of light encounters. I gave a guy a blow job and a different time, we had met a couple that introduced us to BDSM- but nothing penetrating.

Recently, we went to the club for their Halloween night. And we had a LOT of fun! I was finally coming out of my shell and really enjoying myself around multiple people. Had the cards played right, we had been talking to a wonderful gentleman that seemed quite interested in me and my husband was enjoying our flirting back and forth. BUT, just as we were about to ask the guy to join us, I fell and sprained my wrist so bad, we left early and went to the ER to make sure it wasnt broken.

The following night, my husband and I were still running on the high from the club since we hadnt been able to do anything the night before being so exhausted from sitting in the ER all night. So the sex was GREAT with all that charged energy between us!! My husband likes to put scenerios in my head while we are intimate from time to time because I have a great imagination and it really gets me going more. So he was discussing the scenerio of actually sleeping with the other guy and it made me even more aroused.

The night after that, though, wasnt as good. He started trying to talk scenrios again to me and I as I tried to imagine the idea of sleeping with the other man again, I suddenly was overwhelmed with the feeling of shame and guilt. Like I was doing something wrong even though I knew my husband was enjoying himself.

He immediately could tell I was bothered and stopped. He allowed me a moment and I told him I love him and he told me he loves me and we just made love to that feeling of love for each other.

After, I spoke to my husband and told him what happened. He reassured me that he was enjoying himself and would really love to see me sleep with another man but only when I'm ready. So, of course, he understood and agreed when I asked to stick to just light flirting at the club for now. We decided we wont take "more" completely off the table since we have already had those couple of encounters and they hadn't upset me at all. But the main focus and plan wil be just flirting and maybe getting that sexual charged high while getting to know others and not try inviting someone to join unless We really feel that connection. It does still worry me, though, that I could end up in the middle of enjoying myself and get that sudden feeling of shame again.

So my question is: Has anyone else ever had second thoughts? And did it happen during, before, or after? Do those feelings ever return? I really just want to know Im not alone in this and maybe hear some experiences or advice to help my nerves on it.

Tldr: Im worried about feeling guilty when we finally move forward to sleeping with someone else and wonder if anyone has had a similar experience.