A few years ago it came out that my wife and I (Late 20's to early 30's) were both having fantasies about the other having sex with someone else.

For me it was watching all of her holes getting filled with cock and the pleasure that she would receive from it and similarly hers was watching me fuck another woman and the pleasure she would get from my cock.

We would often play with toys (I had a fleshlight and she had a dildo) and would imagine these scenarios. We had talked about having a threesome a few times and maybe even swapping partners.

This continued for a few months until she suddenly got very worried that she would feel incredibly jealous after watching me with another woman and would be able to handle it afterwards. I wouldn't want to risk my amazing marriage with her over something like this but I just don't know where the sudden worry came from.

After that idea kind of died down, we had talked about potentially going to some sort of 'sex club' and just having sex where outher people could see but nothing ever came of that.

I am still very open to the idea of doing all the things we talked about especially since our sex life hasn't been as active as I would have hoped for a while now but I just don't know how to bring this up to her without her thinking that I just want to fuck another woman and that I want her to have fun and pleasure too.

If anyone has any advice or has been through something similar please let me know! Thank you for reading.