I (32M) am new to the LS. My girlfriend (36F) is the polar opposite, she's very experienced and knows her stuff.

I've known for a long time that I am deeply curious about group sex play, but I spent the last 13 years in an unhealthy, monogamous, marriage, and I was unable to ever cultivate or express that side of myself. My divorce finalized a year ago, and six months after that, I started dating my current GF.

This last weekend my GF and I had our first ever couples swap. We spent weeks talking and fantasizing about it before it ever happened, and I got to know the other couple beforehand to help reduce tension and awkwardness. (My GF has known the other couple for quite awhile)

The couple we swapped with were roughly our same ages and were also experienced in the LS. I wasn't particularly attracted to the woman in the other couple, but my GF was very attracted to both of them, and she had apparently been wanting to play with the other couple for some time.

All four of us met up at a sex club Friday evening and we danced, conversated, and enjoyed watching other people doing debaucherous things. I took some MDMA before hand, which looking back wasn't a good idea, because MDMA can really hamper a man's ability to get an erection.

The club was great, everyone had an amazing time, the flow between us all was good and our moods were high. However, things changed when we got to the other couple's Air Bnb.

We weren't alone at their Air BnB. We should've asked them about that before hand but didn't, and that was a communication failure for sure. There were several other couples, and random single people, all playing throughout their rental house. Encountering a larger group threw me off my game a bit.

The four of us went back to a private room but left the door open. We all started passionately playing. The women were all over each other and us two men were all over each other's women.

I couldn't get hard at all, but I did my best to put my disappointment out of my mind and focused on using my mouth and hands to the best of my ability. At some point, a few of the other people in the house came to our open doorway and started watching us all play. I'm not much of a Voyeur, so it was slightly uncomfortable being watched like that.

Both women came and shortly after we all stopped playing. We all made awkward conversation while getting cleaned up and dressed. It was during this time where I told the other couple that this was my first ever group sex experience, and I apologized for my shy penis.

They, and my GF, were very supportive and said that it's normal and not to get tripped up about it. My GF got a message the day after from the other couple, they said they had a great time and wanted to play with us again sometime.

It's been about 4 days now since that experience and I wanted to learn how I can do things better for next time, and hopefully get some advice from the veterans of this LS.

I learned a lot of valuable lessons: - I need to communicate my feelings a lot better. - Don't take substances going into these things, clear heads prevail. - Find actual private space to play because voyeurism messes with my flow. - Relax and stop overthinking everything. - Don't put so much pressure on myself to perform. - If I'm not attracted to the woman I'm playing with in the other couple, speak up, don't force it.

What else could I have done better? Any tips for a newbie like me who, with time, wants to become a relaxed and fantastic group play partner?