Whenever a woman says "open marriage" my spidey sense says "she has someone picked out".

Not fair, but based on what I've seen/read very often true.

Beyond that open marriages suck more for men than women, there are 100 dudes just looking to get laid for every 1 woman who just wants NSA sex. A woman posts nudes on reddit there are 100DM's from guys, a guy does the same there are probably 5, from other guys.

The way this usually goes is the guy thinks he'll be ok in this, and then posts about how he can't even get a 2nd date while every weekend his wife is getting pounded.

But there is a deeper issue.

Swinging = together, most couples we know say they are closer because of swinging.

Open = apart, you aren't getting closer.

I'd only agree to an open marriage if I wanted to be more a room mate with my wife as a business partner, and even then no. As a man my value isn't as a penis but as a partner. Women I'm attracted to won't want a boytoy, they'd want someone to be with and I can't offer that in an open relationship.

She looking for the ok to cheat sounds like she may have met someone

Open marriage is a dangerous thing. Most couples we have met have a lot of drama that is attached. There is definitely jealousy as well. Swinging mostly ensures that everyone is on the same page and that everyone is getting something out of it. It definitely takes work but it is worth it. Whichever you choose, don’t jump in blindly. Keep talking about it and weigh the pros and cons. Set boundaries and limitations.

I will just say this, if any of this is coming from a place of lack or scarcity then this will be extremely difficult. Swinging as a fun activity that adds a little extra fun to an already rock solid relationship is relatively easy compared to an "open marriage". The only positive examples I've seen of open marriages are when the two people are already VERY independent.