For those who have gone through any experience that left you feeling very shitty/demoralized/bruised ego… how did you deal with it?

Most of the times my partner and I have done something w this particular couple… I’ve felt left out / ignored / as if I were gone… no one would’ve noticed . Recently my wife seemed to be having an exponentially better time / as in she hasn’t made the noises she made with me and I just feel inadequate. Normally I have pretty great self esteem, I don’t know if I just wasn’t ready for this or what but it’s really done a number on me.

Before everyone rushes to say “maybe this isn’t for you” etc. trust me I’m not doing this again until I’m 100% ready bc I feel like shit and I don’t want to go through this again. I don’t mind parallel play it’s the swapping that just isn’t for me.

I’d appreciate any advice on mindfulness or just getting over (and it sounds weak to say) but a bruised self esteem, because I have ADHD and my restless mind can not seem to let this go or stop thinking about it etc. Trust me I would’ve stopped thinking about it if I could.

Thanks in advance.