3 weeks ago we started looking for play partners outside of local swinging events we've been to. We've been to these heaps but decided it's time to look outside of them.

I said to him that I'm set on him getting an std test before hand.

We've been together nearly 2yrs. He's never had an std test. Ive had one every 3 months. His excuse is that if I don't have any. He doesn't. When I pretty much was mad... im not an std test.

I put the ultimatum down. He has to have one before we see anyone else. Deems us 100% clean and IF we ever do get one. We may be able to work out who not just play guessing games.

He agreed. I know he hates drs. So sent many sites where he can pay online. Get the test form and go to the blood clinic across the road and do it. The results are uploaded on the site. No drs etc.

3 weeks ago now. I didn't keep asking. I had a feeling he wouldn't do it but I know he'd get shitty if I kept reminding him. He'd accuse me off not trusting him with the stuff etc or something. I shut my mouth. Again I knew he wouldn't.

Here we are 1 day out from a date I organised for us. I asked him if he expected sex on the first date with this girl. He said that he's not going to push for it but if it happens. Great.

I blankly asked did he get the std check.

He left me on read.

Im seeing it as, he didn't respect me before with getting std tests. He can suffer the consequences with it now with me saying sex is off the table tonight. I told him. He agreed To get am std fresh. This is my body at risk to. And he didn't do the one thing I've been firm on with him.

I have not been specific or bossy with anything else. Ive agreed to fmf stuff when he wont do mfm stuff. Ive stuck to only matching with his "body type" which I'm a bit uncomfortable with ass I hate feeling judgey over bodies. I do everything as requested. This is the only thing I've asked and nope.

I messaged again today. 12hrs from the date and said Im assuming his no response is a no and that no we arent having sex tonight. Happy to meet and have a good night but no sex.

AITA? Am I wrong for not nagging him for it? I know he'd get shitty if I did so just left it to him.

Im some what new to this. Ive had cancer and other health issues. I cant afford to get an std especially serious ones. Im trying to be firm with this. But am struggling to stand my ground.